We often confuse rape and other sexual assaults with sex; we apply an incorrect model of violence to assaults of this nature. Most people believe it takes a rapist a certain period of time to sexually assault a victim. But in reality, a rape can occur even in under 10 seconds.

Taking a zero-tolerance approach to unwanted physical contact of any type, rather than trying to ascertain the motivation behind the contact is the safest way to work in such situations. If somebody touches you inappropriately, call it. Don’t wait to see if it happens again or what it may or may not lead to. Each time you let something go, you are moving yourself down the path of inaction and reinforcing your emotional state of denial. There are a variety of reasons why people commit rape, from anger to social inadequacy and emotional immaturity, etc. However, all rapists look to readdress a perceived lack of power and control in their lives through the assault, whether that involves sadistic pleasure, or the need to punish. Rape is not primarily about sex, and sadists for example get more pleasure from the fear and pain of their victim than any actual physical satisfaction.

Sexual predators live their lives on a 24×7 basis, and don’t ever take a day off; even if they haven’t planned an assault, it doesn’t mean that they won’t assault, should the conditions be favorable to them.